2008 Woodie Awards
Taco Bell commercials are both honest and insightful
Rich Knight
Issue date: 1/30/06 Section: Opinion
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Having watched an unhealthy amount of television over this past winter break, I noticed that there were more and more commercials where people rubbed their trembling tummies like Buddha and commented on how full they are. Intrigued, I actually turned myself right side up on my couch-back on the floor, legs on the sofa became inverted-and took notice to what my best friend, Mr. Television, was advertising.
Of course the people in these commercials were talking about how full they were after devouring some obscenely large burrito from the greatest place in the known universe, which is Taco Bell, of course.
And to the chagrin of the people who normally occupy this opinions page, I am not here to rant about the politically left beliefs some may have on how the quesadilla is just another form of oppression (Just look at how tight they pack that cheese in that crust! That cheese needs better housing, dammit!) Nor am I here to make right wing accusations that Taco Bell is too ethnic for its own dern good and that it needs to 'git itsilf back across the border where it belongs! (That IS something some right wing coot would probably say).
No way, Jose! I'm not here to talk about unimportant drivel like healthcare (which will be nonexistent when we're old and cranky) or the war in Iraq (which will bankrupt this country if we don't end it soon), what I'm here to talk about are some of the great deals you can get out of Taco Bell, and how you TOO can be, how the French say, "Le Full en de belli" (and if it's not French, then it's probably Latin.)
To get your tongue doing the tango all over your chapped lips, I'll start your salivating with the items with (get this) cheese in them. For a good dollar and some loose change that might be lodged in your belly button somewhere, you can pick up a Spicy Chicken Burrito, a half el bee (that's lb. for the slow in brain cells-that's okay, I am too) Cheesy bean and rice burrito, and even a spicy chicken soft taco for those of you who don't believe that burritos are the answer to all of life's pragmatic little problems.
Of course the people in these commercials were talking about how full they were after devouring some obscenely large burrito from the greatest place in the known universe, which is Taco Bell, of course.
And to the chagrin of the people who normally occupy this opinions page, I am not here to rant about the politically left beliefs some may have on how the quesadilla is just another form of oppression (Just look at how tight they pack that cheese in that crust! That cheese needs better housing, dammit!) Nor am I here to make right wing accusations that Taco Bell is too ethnic for its own dern good and that it needs to 'git itsilf back across the border where it belongs! (That IS something some right wing coot would probably say).
No way, Jose! I'm not here to talk about unimportant drivel like healthcare (which will be nonexistent when we're old and cranky) or the war in Iraq (which will bankrupt this country if we don't end it soon), what I'm here to talk about are some of the great deals you can get out of Taco Bell, and how you TOO can be, how the French say, "Le Full en de belli" (and if it's not French, then it's probably Latin.)
To get your tongue doing the tango all over your chapped lips, I'll start your salivating with the items with (get this) cheese in them. For a good dollar and some loose change that might be lodged in your belly button somewhere, you can pick up a Spicy Chicken Burrito, a half el bee (that's lb. for the slow in brain cells-that's okay, I am too) Cheesy bean and rice burrito, and even a spicy chicken soft taco for those of you who don't believe that burritos are the answer to all of life's pragmatic little problems.